Joseph D. White, a national expert on catechesis, gave a keynote talk on connecting parents to their children's religious education at the archdiocesan Office of Faith Formation's annual gathering of parish catechetical leaders. (Photo by Nicholas Wolfram Smith/Catholic San Francisco)
Sept. 5, 2019
Nicholas Wolfram Smith
Catechists and directors of religious education opened their year with a roadmap for the “holy grail” of catechesis: getting parents involved in faith formation.
“Family is key to understanding some of the most foundational mysteries of our faith. As the family goes, so goes the parish and so goes the church,” said Joseph D. White.
White, a national expert on catechesis, had been invited to give the keynote address to the archdiocesan Office of Faith Formation’s annual gathering of parish catechetical leaders.
White, a clinical psychologist, catechetical consultant for publisher Our Sunday Visitor, and author of numerous books on catechesis and Catholic education, said God created the family as the best means for handing on the faith. “Programs and institutions support families in their role as primary catechists but they don’t replace the family,” he said.
“To better involve families we have to welcome and meet them where they are,” he said. In a lot of cases, that means meeting people in crisis and struggle, or with hectic schedules and divided attention.
White told a story from his days as a parish director of faith formation about a family who had enrolled their two children in sacramental preparation classes and then stopped coming after a few weeks. Rather than write them off, he called and asked how they were doing. The mother explained her husband had suddenly abandoned her and their children, leaving them without a way to pay for groceries or housing. He invited her to come to the parish, so they could figure out how to support her family. In the end, the children finished their sacraments on time and their mom became the parish’s best catechist. “She said it’s because when her family was going to fall apart, the church became her family.”
For her and countless others, the church can become an important social support, he said, especially today when many people report living further away from relatives and having fewer close friends.
White emphasized the importance of helping people understand the importance of meals and eating together as a family, which fewer families report doing. The meals of Cana and the Last Supper are essential to Christianity, and Jesus often got criticized for simply sharing a meal with sinners, White said.
“The Eucharist is the meal we share with our family the church,” he said. “How can people understand the Eucharist if they don’t have meals with their family?”
White encouraged his audience to get to know the children and parents they serve and what their situations are. That can be done through staying in touch via email, he said, or by preparing activities at the start of each class that children can begin on their own so the catechist has time to talk to parents. Catechists could also help arrange opportunities for families to meet outside classes, in potluck dinners or going to a movie.
“Education for community is one of the tasks of catechesis,” he said. “Making connections is an essential part of what it means to be Catholic.”
Catechists should also consider hosting sessions with parents and children together, so parents can experience the sessions and reinforce lessons at home. Changing behavior does not mean just telling someone what to do, White said, but practicing the behavior with them.
“If you want parents to talk to kids about their faith, you must help them facilitate that in the parish,” he said.
Parents should also understand the way their daily lives connect to their faith, he said, pointing out that the corporal and spiritual works of mercy - feeding the hungry, giving water to the thirsty, instructing the ignorant - are part of the daily fabric of family life.
“Parents should see that even the most mundane, frustrated work of parenthood is an encounter with Jesus Christ,” he said. Daily actions like a commute or putting children to bed can also be opportunities to sanctify the day, through prayers for safe travels or sleep.
White concluded his talk by emphasizing the paradigm shift that catechesis in the church needs to aim at. Instead of relying only on catechists and directors of religious education to form children’s faith, the church needs to build programs that expect, invite and depend on parents’ involvement. Brainstorming roles that parents can take on, regardless of their family situation or time commitments, can move a parish toward a model “where we make all the adults responsible for educating the children of the parish.”